My church Experience

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I don’t understand why healthy, emotionally sane people attend church every week.  I went tonight to try and understand. 

I went with Holly and her younger brother who are both saints and church-goers themselves.

We file into a pew, and instead of listening to the sermon, I was fixated to a pre-teen boy sitting directly in front of me.  He would blow his nose in a tissue and then examine the tissue.  He would do this repeatedly with the same tissue.  It was mesmerizing.  And since I was sitting directly behind him, I was privy to see the contents of the tissue.

The choir was excellent, I’ll give them that.  I got to belt out a few Christmas carols.  It wasn’t before long that I was holding back tears.  I was touched.  Singing alongside my fellow Cheshire kinsfolk in a lively little church in my hometown touches me.  How can I not cry?  Everyone belting out christmas hymns, matching my enthusiasm, sharing the same love of the song – it’s really heartfelt, what more can I say?

I learned to control these tears by keeping my face as emotionally sterile as possible.  It works.

Okay, so I understand that church is heartfelt and warming – essential to people going through crisis, but to go every week?  It reminds me of AA, a constant reminder to stay on track. 

I feel like I’m missing the essential components needed to attend church religiously, but I don’t know what those components are.  Am I not saintly enough?

I can’t seem to commit myself to anything anyway, so why would church be any different?

I use to play World of Warcraft, but couldn’t fully commit to my guild and raiding for 6 hours a night.  I can’t even be a proper geek. 

Maybe I have attention deficit disorder.  That’s why I couldn’t pay attention to the sermon, and why I can’t sit still and raid for 7 hours.  That’s it!  I have ADD!  I can get myself medicated and then go to church and finally understand it.


I’m going to watch Ong-Bak the Thai warrior now.  My brother recommended it to me.  He know’s I like Kung Fu flicks. 

I’m in a weird mood.



Filed under All about me, journal

9 responses to “My church Experience

  1. Holly

    You are hysterical! ok….The boy examining his tissue was a little distracting – I’ll give you that. There was no real sermon, maybe thats why you could not follow along; it was just a few passages between the songs. However, it is not like AA – no one sits there saying ‘Hi My name is…and i…”. There are no essential components needed to attend church, people go for different reasons…its an individual thing.
    OH….and I am NOT a saint!!! I have many faults.

    • Holly

      I am glad you liked the choir. Our director has won awards for his work. I’m going to Midnight Mass again…if your interested. Maybe we can sit behind a baby and make faces at him all night 🙂

    • Yes you are a saint! I think I’m sprouting horns, which isn’t so bad because it will scare away my crazy aunt and robert.
      Church and AA have a lot of similarities such as comforting people in a time of need. Some AA meetings are held in churches.

  2. Steph

    I LOVE going to Holly’s church!!!!!!!! it is not like the roman catholic St. Bridget’s that I’m used to. Holly’s church pews are cushioned hehehe

  3. Kali

    First, it is so weird how ALL of my conversations lately are overlapping-I was just talking to my grandparents about going to church the other night! I went through a church phase freshman year. I went a couple times but just couldn’t get into it. I guess I go to church when I’m in the mood (every few years). My friend invited me to her church on Christmas Eve for the living cresche (sp?) Basically that means they set real sheep loose among the pews and everyone dresses up as somebody from the Nativity scene. I am “Wise Man Number 1”.

    Those are my thoughts on church.

    • I would like to go to the living chresche just so I can write about it. It sounds a little nutty. Who cleans up after the sheep after they poop all over the pews?

  4. Only 1.2 percent said they believe Darwins scientific theory of evolution where God had no part.Researchers said people with lower levels of education those who attend church regularly those who are 65 or older and those who identify with the Republican Party are more likely to believe in the biblical story of the origin of humans.The poll was conducted in September but no margin of error figures or other information was available.Thank heavens! In response to the recent concerns about the environment and over population the EMLDS church has come up with an official stance on the debate.

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